Helaine Iris

About the Author

Helaine Iris is a Life and Business Coach, who has been featured in numerous publications, including "O" The Oprah Magazine. She helps entrepreneurs and professional women accelerate their professional success, while achieving a more complete and fulfilling personal life. She combines a broad range of professional experience in her work, including management positions in the education, training, retail and international non-profit sectors. You can contact Helaine via email here or online here.

What is Your Life Telling You?

The other day I was coaching Emily, a bright and self aware woman who’s recently stepped up to a very big plate - she wants to take her business to the next level. Her decision holds the potential for many rich and fulfilling rewards, but also contains a rather steep learning curve, an increase in pressure and of course much higher stakes. Interestingly enough, as she meets her days with passion and excitement, she also notices an increase in how easily she gets triggered and upset by seemingly mundane events that throw her off and make her constantly question her ability to succeed.

Emily is a consultant who works in the education system, but she’s also single and very much wants to be in a long term relationship. When immersed in her work with others, all she seems to notice is how happy and successfully married her coworkers are. Then she feels jealous, and begins to question her life, as if she’s “missed the boat”.

When she was describing her experience to me and musing about how painfully distracting it was, she asked me, “What do you think the universe is trying to tell me?”

I then proceeded to take a very deep breath and respond. I said, ” the universe…well, not exactly. I think it’s you life.” Then I told her while it might make it easier to blame her confused feelings on a booming message from the universe - I told her I thought it was her life speaking to her.

I firmly believe every day, your life does speak to you, sometimes in quiet ways, and sometimes like a 2 X 4 on the head. In Emily’s case, I think some older part of her wants permission to abandon her audacious dream of an international career and focus instead on finding the relationship that her childhood, and culture taught her would be her ultimate fulfillment. Poised on the brink of success - understandably Emily is scared.

Learning to listen to your life offers you the gift of valuable feedback from a very reliable source: YOU! The art form of life is to discern what the information means and what to do with it. The opportunity for Emily is to examine her fears, her old beliefs and what’s getting in her way - not to get caught up believing one choice over the other, marriage over career, or career over marriage is the answer.

Ultimately, Emily has to find her own answers about what her life is telling her - as do we all. I believe being courageous enough to ask the question creates the foundation we need in our lives to be successful on all levels. So, what is your life telling you?

It’s YOUR life…imagine the possibilities!

4 Comment(s)

  1. On Jun 15, 2008, dennis parmelee said:

    Having the courage to think for ourselves and to decide what we want, and how we describe personal “success” is a choice avaiable to all of us. Harv T. Eker says when confronted with a choice, winners choose both.
    Another interesting author, Arnold Patent would agree(You can have it all). Go for it.

  2. On Jun 20, 2008, Boris said:

    It’s all about motivation, confidence and self-esteem.

  3. On Jul 15, 2008, Lucy B. said:

    So…true. Most of us look from the outside. Blaming the external or looking for answers from that. While all the solutions are simply within us.

  4. On Jul 16, 2008, Jan said:

    I think Emily is a big fan of “The Secret”. Well, I guess I have to agree with you that we the ones responsible to our own life and not the universe.

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